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PoliceForcestuck: Case of the Stolen Jewels Part 1Police Officer Karkat Vantas walks through the streets of Skaia. The early morning fog only dampens his already shitty day in this spit size of a town. A school bus full of snot nose little shits goes past him with the brats pointing and laughing at the sixteen-sweep-old police officer.
Karkat grabs a cigarette from the inside of his jacket; usually he tries to avoid smoking
when he gets close to work because of that fucking law prohibiting it, but he really needs
a smoke right now.
He brings the cigarette and the gray lighter close to his face, and as he finally gets the
damn thing to light after a thousand shitty attempts; a car com
PoliceForcestuck: Case of the Stolen Jewels Part 2"So what are you hungry for, Karkat?" Jade asks holding a menu in front of her face.
Karkat is looking outside of the diner window resting his head on his hands, "I'll just have the same thing I always have."
"And what would that be?" Jade questions.
Karkat barks back, "Why do you bother asking? You'll just find out when our orders are taken!"
The female officer slams her menu on the table and glares at Karkat, "Why do you have to
be so difficult? I'm just trying to be social!"
Karkat returns the glare, "Well don't! I don't want you here and I'll be counting the days
till you leave!"
"Oh? And when will that be?"
Karkat grins, "When
A Very Hungry Grub"Kankri! Where have you gone now, dear?" Dolorosa called, walking around her hive.
The young grub she had found and adopted was a cheeky one; always hiding from his troll lusus. He had grown quite considerably in not just his normal growth since she took him home. As of lately he had formed quite an appetite and was always squealing for seconds. This was normal, though; he would be ready to form a cocoon soon.
With no luck in finding the grub hiding anywhere, Dolorosa tried one last tactic; "Well, if you don't come out, I guess I'll have to eat dinner all by myself!"
There was a squeal from behind the bookcase as Kankri showed himself. Dol
Terezi VS Bill Mays▼: T3r3zis offic3. Cicil sp3aking whats your probl3m??
▲: HI. BILLY MAYS HERE WITH THE OXICLEAN, THE STAIN SPECILAST.
▼: miss t3r3zi has told you many atim3s
▼: w3 will not b3 uying any
▲: WELL, IF YOU BUY IN THE NEXT FORTY MINUTES YOU'LL RECEIVE A SQUIRT BOTTLE ALONG WITH A SUPER SHAMMY. FOR ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY FREE!
▲: ILL ALSO THROW IN A BOTTLE OF THE WORLD FAMOUS ORANGE GLO, MADE WITH PURE, VIRGIN ORANGE OIL.
▼: *SQUIRTS BILLY MAYS WITH A WATER BOTTLE* NO H4RR4SSING MY 4SSIST4NT!
▲: *melts while whispering* that's the power of oxicleaaaaaaaan
Chicken Game JohnDaveYOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▼: hey to you too, bro!
▲: john... i wasn't expecting you
▼: me neither. rose asked me to come along to this memo for some reason?
▲: did she now?
▲: sounds like she is planing something
▼: lalondeeeeee! :(
▲: i shouldn't have told her... so how's it going?
▼: same as always, i suppose. i'm just going through some old movies.
▼: shouldn't have told her what?
▲: oh she finally got to pick my brain and got me to say some shit
▲: just the normal stuff
▲: i guess
▲: sounds like f
Sollux: Be an internet whoreYOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▲: 2ee me naked at http://hotpiic2ofme.com
▲: that wa2n't really meant for you...
▼: now im considering clicking it
▲: okay, but, iit'2 a pay2iite.
▲: ju2t 2ayiing.
▼: well i got it
▼: well shit im not paying to see you naked then
▲: try two under2tand, thii2 ii2 pretty ea2y money, e2peciially when you're...
▲: endowed, liike ii am.
▲: iit wa2n't meant for people ii know...
tHIS WAS SAD,,,YOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▼: kk, are you there?
▲: sORRY, nO kARKAT HERE, jUST ME.
▲: bUT, uHH, i DID SEE HIM A WHILE AGO,
▼: oh, okay, hey can ii a2k you a que2tiion?
▲: oF COURSE, aNYTHING,
▼: ii dont have tiime two look for hiim anyway
▼: what do you know about wound2 and 2tuff?
▲: nOT A LOT, i GUESS, bUT UHH, i COULD TRY TO HELP,
▲: wHAT HAPPENED,
▼: well, uh... that doe2nt really matter
▼: ii ju2t need two know how two 2top iit bleediing, iit2 pretty deep
▲: i'M, nOT SURE IF i CAN HELP, iF i DON'T KNO
jOHN IS A DICK,YOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▼: rawr! i'm a scary dinosaur!
▲: oH, i GET IT, oKAY,
▲: i'M AN ANGRY BULL,
▼: haha, hi tav!
▲: yOU CONFUSE ME,
▲: lIKE, a LOT,
▲: sO, wHY ARE YOU A DINOSAUR, eXACTLY,
▼: i like dinosaurs
▲: i REALLY THINK YOU SHOULD OCCUPY YOURSELF, wITH YOUR GAME, iNSTEAD OF WITH BEING A DINOSAUR,
▲: yOUR FRIENDS NEED YOU, dON'T THEY,
▼: uhm, not right now, no
▼: i'm in a car, bored, soooo
▼: i'm a dinosaur!
▲: oKAY, tHEN,,,
▲: i DON'T KNOW HOW TO SUSTAIN THIS CONVERSATION, fOR MUCH LONGER,
Gamzee is an actor▲: WhAt's uP, mOtHeRfUcKiNg bEsT FrIeNd?
▼: HOW IN THE FUCK
▼: WHAT IS IT NOW
▲: WhOa dUdE, cHiLl.
▲: I JuSt wAnNa cHaT WiTh mY MoThErFuCkInG BeSt bRo nOw, AlRiGhT?
▼: AS IF I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH SHIT TO DEAL WITH.
▼: ALRIGHT FINE
▼: WHAT'S ON YOUR THINKPAN
▲: SlAm sOmE WiCkEd eLiXeR AnD ReLaX.
▼: HOW ABOUT I INSTEAD SLAM THIS DESK INTO MY HEAD AND SCREAM.
▲: HoW AbOuT SoMe mUfFiNs? I MaDe tHeSe mOtHeRfUcKiNg fAyGo mUfFiNs mAn.
▲: ThEy tAsTe lIkE MiRaClEs. HaVe yOu tAsTeD A MiRaClE LaTeLy?
▼: IF MY MIRACLE YOU MEAN COMPLETE DISSAPOINTMENT, YES
Muffins and Miracle Nubs.YOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▲: HeY MoThErFuCkInG BeSt fRiEnD.
▼: GOG DAMNIT
▲: LoNg tImE No sEe, KaRcApTaIn mY CaPtAiN.
▲: YoU Up fOr kIcKiN BaCk sOmE WiCkEd eLiXeR, bRo?
▲: I MaDe mUfFiIiIiIiIiInS.
▼: FUCK YOUR MUFFINS
▼: UH NO WHAT WOULD EVER MAKE YOU THINK I WOULD DO ANY OF THAT STUPID FUCKING SHIT WITH YOU
▲: BeCaUsE, dUdE, yOu'rE My mOtHeRfUcKiNg bEsT FrIeNd.
▲: ThAt's wHaT MoThErFuCkInG BeSt tRoLl bUdS Do mAn.
▼: NO THEY DO FUCKING NOT
▲: CoMe oN, kArKaT. MuFfInS!
▼: YOU'RE AN IDIOT
▼: I HATE YOU M
Sollux likes rainbowdrinkers.YOU ARE NOW TALKING TO A RANDOM FUCKASS. SAY SOMETHING, ASSHOLE!
▼: Good Evening Sollux
▼: How Are You Faring
▲: i'm 0kay.
▲: eridan melted my eyes 0ut, but that's alright. i'm 0kay with that.
▲: h0w ab0ut y0u?
▼: Yes I Know Sollux I Was Present Remember
▼: As For Myself I Am Content If Not Slighlty Thirsty
▲: y0u were rather unc0nsci0us when that happened. i w0uldn't have expected y0u t0 remember.
▲: i mean, you definately weren't there when i w0ke up, either.
▲: but that's 0kay. i'm 0kay with that.
▼: I Am N
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`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More